CENSORSHIP:
I went to the Titanic Burger place and ordered a giant cheeseburger with everything on it except onions.
"I can't do that," said the clerk.
"Why not?"
"Well, a U.S. district judge has ruled that removing part of the whole Titanic Burger experience injures the creative expression of our chef. It's a copyrighted recipe."
"But onions make me sick!"
"Sorry. What if somebody else accidentally got a Titanic Burger without onions? They might think that's the way we intended our burgers to taste."
"Can't you just put a label on it that says NO onions?"
"Nope. You'll have to take them out yourself -- if you can find all the pieces."
"I guess I won't be eating any more Titanic Burgers!" I said, and drove away.
For burgers or DVDs, we could soothe the creative temperament of chefs and producers alike with a simple disclaimer that parts have been deleted. In the meantime I won't be buying a copy of "Titanic" on DVD. I really don't want to see Kate's onions.
-- Margaret Leigh, letter to the editor, deseretnews.com, 7/11/06